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My Thanksgiving Wish for You

This is my first time posting so let me introduce myself. I’m John Davis, Managing Partner of The Cramer Institute and Kathy’s husband — now widower.

This is also the first time I have ever spent Thanksgiving by myself — as in alone with no one else here. (Well, the puppies are here.) I am doing so by choice — in a very purposeful way for a very intentional reason, about which I would like to offer some Thanksgiving thoughts.

In early 2015, the red flag of cancer went up for Kathy. After almost a year of tre
atment, her oncologist classified Kathy as in remission. Then in the last week of June this year the alarms sounded that something was off and in three weeks Kathy was gone. Since July 13th, my world and I dare say, the world of the many people who knew her and were influenced by her, has taken on a dramatically different form and feel.

I have chosen to be alone “in retreat” this Thanksgiving week to give myself a chance to more deeply process the impact that losing Kathy is having on my life and seek guidance within for letting go and finding my next steps.

Kathy’s impact has been and will continue to be felt, discussed and held sacred. For sure, she lives on in my heart and in the hearts of many others. For sure, I have a gaping hole left in my heart with her death. But at the same time I have the tremendous gift that is to be able to hold her and her love in my heart each day and each moment in each day.

My heart, I now see and feel, is also holding a huge amount of gratitude, especially this week. That gratitude brings me to one of the reasons I am writing this post. That reason, of course, is YOU. Each of YOU.

How can the loss of such a precious life turn into these moments that are so life-giving?

For me, it is a reflection of the love that YOU each have in your hearts. And that is why, today, my heart is so full of gratitude for all that YOU have been giving. That is why today, in the quiet that surrounds me, I can feel the accumulation of support that has been coming my way and how it is transforming me. With every kind note, phone call, tweet, and email following Kathy’s death, YOU have held me, encouraged me, and challenged me to move forward in her honor.

In the stack of papers I brought with me, I happened to find a holiday card that Kathy had given me 20 years ago. Her words feel like just the right way to close this Thanksgiving note to you. Listen to her words carefully, hear her voice, see her smile, and know she is loving each of us in this very moment:

“Something amazing happens when we surrender and just love.

We melt into another world, a realm of power already within us.

The world changes when we change, the world softens when we soften.

The world loves us when we choose to love the world.” KDC, 1996

And so I choose to give thanks to and for each of YOU and feel the support and encouragement I am sending back your way.

It is from a very grateful heart.


P.S. You’ll be hearing more from me and the other partners of The Cramer Institute as we continue Kathy’s important leadership and Asset-Based Thinking work. Stay tuned!